The Four Best Memories

When Alec looks right over my head,

because really who doesn’t,

and I do nothing worthy of being noticed,

because really how could I,

I tell myself that I don’t have a crush…

but I so do.

Then I tell myself to honor girl code and why do I have the same crush as my best friend!

That is not what I want.

I want to be highly attractive the way Emily is,

not exactly that she’s beautiful, but that everybody wants to see and know her,

I want Ally’s confidence, her only thing worth wanting,

and Leslie’s smile which is indiscriminate and lovely,

I want to stop being unspectacular,

so I simply remember:

Jack, Broadway, shopping, and last May with “Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries,”

shallow memories, but the best ones anyway,

and then I’m perfect again.

I am most talented again, most beautiful again, most most again

and everybody will always love me.

It all just becomes okay because with Jack, Broadway, Shopping, and “Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries”

I have lived a thousand and one night lives.

None of which included Alec.

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